Fanny, Fairy, Fi-Fi, Flower, V’Jay, Ginny, Wee Wee, Pee Pee, Hoo-ha, Bits, Front Bum, Cupcake, Willy, Doddle, Dick, Sausage, Balls, Princess Sophia or Krull the Warrior King….. the list could go on!
Don’t beat around the… ‘bush’
Call your and your child’s body parts what ever you want to and are comfortable calling them, it is your family! If you are unsure or are expecting parents yet to label them or discuss this, please try and use the correct anatomical terms, experts are insisting parents do this!
Personally we are not a family to shorten and make child friendly labels for any words like, eat your ‘din din’, do you want a ‘nanna’ or a ‘chippie’, need to do a ‘wee wee’ or look at those cute little ‘tootsies’ and so on! For us we use the correct names for everything, for food, items, activities and body parts. Why such a drama with naming our privates?
Call it what it is
Vulva, Vagina, Penis, Scrotum, Testicles, Breasts, Bottom, Anus.
Many people have different opinions on this topic and it becomes a heated discussion in Mummy Madness as a post on vaccines. Is it because we consider them “private parts” we are too private to talk about them openly? Like ‘that time of the month’ when a woman is on her menstrual cycle, and wont say ‘periods’ because that is gross! It’s ok to feel nervous or embarrassed to say these words, it could be a part of your upbringing that you didn’t use these words, it could be something more and it could be nothing at all.
Lets just for a moment discuss the ‘correct’ term. If we are jumping on the ‘lets use the correct words’ wagon, we should be calling female genitals, vulva, not vagina, which seems to be the norm. When I mentioned this recently in a MM post, a lot (prob 99%) of people thought the word vulva was to…… I don’t know, vulgar! Maybe we have gotten too comfortable with using the word vagina that vulva seems as inappropriate as using a nickname! I was reassured that these days vagina is an acceptable word to use and understood, but we are a ‘vulva’ using word family.
Anyway, if you do use nicknames for privates take a look at 10 Reasons the experts give to not!
1. Body parts such as penis and vagina should be used in conversation as you would talk about your arm, elbow and leg, although different they are still body parts that should be accepted without shame or nervousness.
2. Using nicknames can inadvertently teach them that those body parts are a ‘rude’ different and potentially lead to keeping an abuse hidden.
3. When not embarrassed using the correct anatomic words, children can feel empowered and comfortable asking questions and telling of any abuse.
4. It could assist with body image and self confidence.
5. Potential abusers can be challenged if a young children uses the correct names “don’t touch my penis”.
6. Paedophiles can use nicknames as it doesn’t put an adult perspective of sexual abuse to what they are doing and can consider to be harmless.
7. If your child starts using nicknames, in a household that doesn’t, this can be a red flag that someone could be grooming, conditioning and or abusing your child and worth questioning.
8. Nicknames don’t have the same impact as using the correct words and can cast reasonable doubt in the legal system.
9. Body awareness and using real names for body parts can make communication clearer.
10. For medical reasons, identifying becomes easier to understand and in explanation.
What MM has said
“No need to change the name of what they are.”
“I taught my girls ‘vulva’ as vagina actually refers to the inner part or ‘birth canal’. At first it was embarrassing for me but I just sucked it up and kept a straight face and now after a couple of years vulva sounds completely normal to me. Recently my eldest has been asking about how the baby gets outs so we have been talking about the vagina, but the general genital area is always called a vulva.”
“If a child need to make a statement/ go to court regarding sexual abuse nothing but the proper names will hold up in court for the predator to be convicted.”
“To help prevent sexual abuse it’s important for kids to use proper names.”
“Research shows most predators will avoid proper names as it lessons the severity of their crime and actions in their own mind. “I’m only touching her who-ha” vs “I’m touching her vagina” sounds a lot different.”
“Truly, it’s just a name. It’s not rude, embarrassing or inappropriate. You feeling that will just pass onto your kids. You wouldn’t call your fingers or toes anything different.”
“My son calls his penis a doodle, he is 7 and that is what we have always called it. Doodle was a pretty universal name for a penis when i was growing up.”
“I teach my kids – lady bits and doodle. I don’t care what anyone says you would clearly know what they are talking about if they need to get a point across!”
“We just say fanny and willy in our house. They do know the proper names though. It’s no different to having a nick name.”
“They know the correct terms but call them V-Jay Jay and Doodle.”
” Just privates or Willy, my daughter calls hers a flower, they know the correct terminology But for everyday speak they choose to call them privates, Willy or flower and I’m cool with that … and they can call their privates whatever they want.”
“My kids will call everything they have a child friendly alternative until they’re old enough to understand the correct name, meaning and use.
I will NOT have my 3yr old running around calling her genitalia its correct name as an adult woman does. Nothing wrong with teaching a child a better option for their young age whilst teaching them the importance of privacy, self respect and making sure that above all, no matter what its called that NOBODY touches their private parts.
My 3 year old asked me what her nipples were the other day. We told her they were buttons at first. But I changed my mind and told her they were called boobies. Be damned if my 3yr old is running around calling out “my breasts”.”
With so many names and so many opinions to match, what do you call them?